Words of encouragement and praises
The Magic words
If your child doesn’t listen to you, praise him for his handwriting, speed, toys, shirt, bag, drawing, watch, dog, cat … anything you find good about … and he’ll listen attentively.
Encourage a child and he wouldn’t want to miss even a single word.
Have you ever noticed? … when your boss praises your work or encourages you in the morning, how delighted you are! You feel like pouring your heart in the work you do, even if there is no other good reason. The words of praise keep ringing sweet bells in your ears throughout the day. In the evening, you even tell your wife about it.
You are unconsciously happy about the boss who appreciates you. Next time your boss tells you some more work to do, you hesitate to say “no”.
Words to encourage people work like magic.
We can be easily led by people if they show appreciation for our work, ability, performance, belongings etc.
We are all alike … including kids.
Few words of appreciation get results where criticism and ridicule fail. Give honest and sincere appreciation and encouragement to kids and they would do anything for you. Parents’ daily words of encouragement condition this process permanently.
The purpose of praise is to genuinely appreciate the kids with a view to encourage them to make more efforts for improvement and success.
How does it work?
The deepest urge in human nature is ‘the desire to be important’. Everybody is hungry for appreciation words. Praise is food for soul and self-esteem.
Praise makes us feel good. When we feel good, we do good. And when we do good, we feel good. Words of praise set a wonderful cycle into motion which keeps producing good results. Praise by gestures also produces same effects as verbal praise does.
Praise opens our mind and heart and sets them in acceptance mode. We’re naturally biased towards the one who praises us. We think he’s on our side and not on the other side. He seems like a close friend.
We want to please him and look for opportunity to favour him, even if we have to go out of the way for that purpose. We don’t want to annoy him because we want him to keep us in his good books and continue praising us. Saying ‘NO’ to him is a big task for us. We want to listen to this person more than anyone else.
AND NOW … this person is in a position to lead us.
We are all alike … including kids.
Positive words of encouragement and praise make a child feel important in his own little world. He walks on air… feels two inches taller that time. He’s in listening mode for whatever you say.
AND NOW … you are in a position to lead him.
Positive effect of words of appreciation on kids
Like every adult, every child wants to feel valued and appreciated. If you praise him for the good things he does, he is more likely to do good things again. Your praise helps him know good things about himself, which is first step towards developing those good things.
Parents’ appreciation is invaluable for the kids. If you show no interest and approval in the things they do right, you are encouraging and conditioning them not to do anything right.
Nothing kills the ambitions as criticism does. Replace criticism with appreciation. When criticism is minimized and praise is emphasized, the good things kids do will be reinforced and the poorer things will eliminate.
The children who get frequent appreciation for the good things they do, feel good about themselves. Their self-esteem goes up. Based on their past good experiences, they take initiatives to do new things. They set new and higher goals for themselves.
This is the powerful effect of praise on a child’s personality.
Even if you have a highly defiant and spoiled child of the first order, there must be something positive about him. Try to find it and appreciate it.
First few days there may not be any improvement and it might upset you. Slowly some of his faults will begin to disappear. He will start to do some things in the right way.
Keep praising for new things and you will keep finding new things as the time goes by. If you persist and give appreciation and praise in the right way, very soon you will notice great transformation in the child’s behavior.
Then it won’t be necessary to react the way you used to. He will be doing far more right things than wrong.
But what do we actually do?
… The exact opposite! We go mad when kids do something wrong, and say noting to praise our kids for numerous small things they do right in the course of daily life. The power of Praise is most under utilized at home.
Almost all of us are conditioned to be very quick to criticize and extremely slow and reluctant to praise others. Praising seems to be a burdensome task to us. Even if we notice good things about others, we avoid mentioning it to them. But we jump out of our soul to tell them their bad things. The whole world is like that.
When ever your child steps out of home, expect him to face same kind of reaction from the world. The whole world is waiting out there, eager to keep telling your kid what’s wrong with him. It’s our responsibility to tell him what’s right about him.
We are in the most advantageous position to promote our kids self esteem. Let’s not miss the opportunity.
I appreciate you for ….???
The whole world might not know much about your kid. But you know a lot. If you can’t notice anything to praise him about, how can you expect the world to do so?
If we have the desire, we can find numerous good things about our kids in one single day. Don’t waste time in finding words for the perfect praise. Just keep our eyes and ears open and discover the little things we can appreciate our kids about, and TELL THEM ABOUT IT!
You can find anything to praise about your kid. If you need help finding things to praise your child about, try doing a craft from Rachel's create-kids-crafts.com where you can find lots of interesting things for your child, which you can appreciate.
I am sure nobody needs a microscope to find good things about their kids.
How to praise and encourage a child.
Praise the child for his efforts not for his intelligence or talents.
Perils of over-praise: Don't over-praise your child.
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